Friends have been asking me for years to "write what I feel" here. I seldom get to do so. Preaching and expositions don't count. They want me to write what's on my mind and in my heart. Sometimes, evading these things makes you want to write dissertations on some theological or sociological issue, rather than attempt to dissect what's really inside you.
That can be a scary thing, as we know: baring your heart online. Man, I've even heard of blogs where people dump all their hang-ups and graphically describe their pains, hurts and abuses (no I am not talking about pornographic blogs here).
Not only is it a scary thing to do, but I am also wary of what I would be dumping online for all and sundry. It isn't so much about "baring all," but being responsible for what you say or think. Some people are quite impressionable, you see, and you might do harm when all you really wanted to do was unwind.
It is a common thing in today's generation to "be yourself" without regard for what others may see, think, feel or do. "Self expression rules!" they say.
That, to me, is a clear sign of an irresponsible person. Having walked that road before, I am painfully aware of the damage I have done to many people's lives because of my inability to see beyond my nose and feel beyond my own feelings.
As a Christian, I believe I am compelled by a Higher Authority to be more circumspect in these matters, so I could not simply "tell it all." This does not make me a stuck-up prude or hypocrite. Of course I have feelings! I have joys and pains, struggles, victories and defeats! I am not wearing a "happy face" for the world to see and applaud, but I know that not all will understand, so some things are better left between me and a few, and some things are only between me and my God.
That is a comfort: to have a Gd who cares and listens. To know that life is not random chance and all the hurts are temporary. To the one who knows God, Psalm 115:3, which says Our God is in heaven; he does whatever pleases him.
is not a threat but an assurance that everything is in control. Nothing happens without His knowledge and everything has a purpose. I will cry and be hurt, but joy will come in the morning. The Maker of time has made sure that it will not be always night, and even then, He gives us “songs in the night” (Job 35:10, Psalm 77:6).
Whom have I in heaven but you?
And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
My flesh and my heart may fail,
but God is the strength of my heart
and my portion forever.
(Psalm 73:25-26)
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